My Summer at the Pardes Institute in Jerusalem (2022)

“LilyFish, what did you do in Jerusalem this summer?” 

I did the Pardes Institute's Jewish Educator Summer Workshop. Here are some photos and reflections. 

WEEK ONE: 

“ ‏שבת שלום מישראל!!”Shabbat Shalom from Israel!! My first week of the @pardesinstitute summer program is done, and I thought I would share a tidbit of learning with you before Shabbat begins here.

This bit is from my morning Talmud class titled “Don’t Shoot the Messenger…Or Should We? Agency in Jewish Law” taught by @rabbanitrachel - it’s based on when Talmud allows or encourages us to use a “שליח” (shaliach) - a proxy - to complete a mitzvah. We have learned that while there are Mitzvot that it is totally allowed to use a proxy for, it’s sometimes still better to do it yourself - a “ ‏מצווה בו יותר”. The examples the text gives are preparing for Shabbat and Betrothal.

This seems to have something to do with the Jewish value “הידור מצוה ” (Hiddur Mitzvah) - beautifying the mitzvah. In Jewish law there are many many mitzvot- it would be absurd to expect each person to complete every single mitzvah and all of its prep in the most holy way possible all the time. Instead, this idea of ‎“הידור מצוה ” teaches that we should choose the Mitzvot we are most suited to put full effort in, and we can send a “‎שליח” / proxy to do some of the others.

To put this into context, let’s take the example of a Shabbat Dinner. I am simply not a good cook- I don’t enjoy it and my food doesn’t usually come out tasting good. So for a Shabbat Meal, I don’t usually volunteer to cook! Instead, I might offer to do something more in my skill set- perhaps setting the table nicely or giving a d’var torah.

I love that Judaism encourages us to play to our own strengths in this way.

What is a Mitzvah (it could be something you feel obligated to or it could be a good deed) that you would like to choose to beautify this week?

WEEK TWO:

Shabbat Shalom after another wonderful week at @pardesinstitute ! This week I’m spending Shabbat with my teacher @rabbanitrachel and her family.

Yesterday night I went to Shul with them, and during the Amidah I felt myself drawn to one section- Hoda’ah / Grattitude. Here is the translation I like of that section:

~~~

We give thanks to you that you are THE ALL-MERCIFUL, our G!d, G!d of our ancestors, today and always. A firm, enduring source of life, a shield to us in time of trial, you are ever there, from age to age. We acknowledge you, declare your praise, and thank you for our lives entrusted to your hand, our souls placed in your care, for your miracles that greet us every day, and for your wonders and the good things that are with us every hour, morning, noon, and night. Good One, whose kindness never stops, Kind One, whose loving acts have never failed—always have we placed our hope in you.

For all these things, may your name be blessed and raised in honor always, forever.

Let all of life acknowledge you! May all beings praise your name in truth, O G!d, our rescue and our aid. Blessed are you, THE GRACIOUS ONE, whose name is good, to whom all thanks are due.

~~~

For many progressive an secular Jews, it’s not necessarily comfortable to thank G!d in this way. Whether that’s because we don’t believe in G!d, or simply because it can be hard to think of the good things that are always part of our world when we also recognize so much suffering.

For me, this section reminds me to slow down and think about the good. I can’t tell you how to be grateful, you certainly don’t have to use these words if they aren’t meaningful to you, but I do think that it’s important to take a moment and reflect.

Big appreciation to everyone in my support networks! Being away from home and the people I love is hard, and I’m grateful to my learning community for all of the love and support.

Translation from Kol Haneshamah, the @reconstructingjudaism Shabbat VeHagim Siddur, 3rd edition.

WEEK 3:

Today was my last day at @pardesinstitute . One of my favorite moments from this summer was the Pardes Tisch. At the Tisch, Rabbi Mike offered a teaching about the Parsha cycle. I turns out that Israeli and Diaspora communities have been a week off from each other since Pesach. This is because the last day of Pesach outside of Israel was Shabbat so diaspora Jews read a Pesach-specific parsha, but in Israel it wasn't Pesach anymore so they read the next parsha chronologically. Next week however, Jews all over the world will reunite for parshat D'varim, the beginning of the book of Deuteronomy. Rabbi Mike said that while we were in BaMidbar, translated to "in the desert," it was okay for us to be a bit all over the place. We didn't know where we were going or when we would get there. To come into the Promised Land though, we all needed to get on the same page. The Israelites needed to unify in a way that we couldn't before. And I believe that we do that through learning and through song.

I've always loved singing. Singing brings people together. That is why countries have national anthems, why schools have cheers, and why Red Sox fans sing “Sweet Caroline” in the middle of the eighth inning of every game. For me, singing has always represented my connection to my Jewish community and this was never more clear to me than it was at the Tisch. Singing "Hinei Ma Tov with all 120 other Pardes students connects me with them; I am part of the community. But being in Jerusalem has helped me to realize that Pardes actually isn’t the overarching community. I am singing the same words as 550,100 Jews in Jerusalem, and 14.8 million other Jews in the world. I am singing the same words I imagine my grandmother sang when she was seventeen, and the same words her grandmother’s grandmother sang. This community is my home. No matter what, I know that I am connected to all of the other people who have sung these same words. The values, teachings, and community that this peoplehood connects me to - all these things help make me the person I am.

END-OF-PROGRAM SPEECH MOMENT (unedited): 

Hi. Okay, so I first heard about Pardes Institute of Jewish Studies so many years ago, and I actually signed up to come here for a summer program one time before. It was supposed to be the summer before my senior year of college. I was supposed to come with my best friend, who I've been referring to as “my best friend Leah who I'm obsessed with” this whole time. And I was really, really excited to come and learn. I was also going to do Ulpan before… and that was summer 2020. Did not happen. The world had other plans. And so then I was thinking about what I was going to do this summer. I'm here because of many, many people and with much financial help from many people, including the Springboard Fellowship and the Wethen Blume Families. And when I was thinking about what I could do that was going to further my Jewish life, this was this was the answer to what I wanted to do. I like to say about my Jewish journey that I grew up watching my lesbian rabbi play guitar on the Bima on Shabbat, and her wife was my Hebrew school teacher. And that's very true. And going from that to Brandeis University, which is a campus that really strives for pluralism. And in some ways succeeds and in other ways falls short. That was also a difficult transition for me. And then I moved again. And and the the campus that I'm on right now working at is called Vanderbilt. And most of my students are secular or reform. I have a few conservative students as well. And I forgot how much I liked being in community with Jews who don't practice similarly to me. And so I want to thank everyone for for being part of that community. We I've had lots of wonderful, wonderful discussions. And I think someone said you just said once a teacher, once a student. And I think that that is one of the biggest things that I'm taking from this experience, from working on working on the my project this summer. I one of my favorite lines from Torah is right at the beginning. And Genesis, I think it's Genesis two something. It's it is not good for human to be alone. It's not good for the earthling to be alone. And I just have not felt alone here. I've felt very much in community. And so thank you so, so much to everyone who was part of the community. My students, while they were doing Zoom services, didn't sing Hinei Ma Tov. That was a decision that they made that they were not going to sing about how good it is to be together while they were not together. And so I wanted to invite us to sing Hinei Ma Tov while we are all still here together and to feel that community.

My Jewish Journey: Rosh Hashanah 5780

Each year at my synagogue, Dorshei Tzedeck, someone shares their Jewish Journey. This year, I shared. Read my Jewish Journey speech below, or listen to it at this link.

Good Morning! If you haven’t yet met me, my name is Lily Fisher Gomberg, I go by LilyFish & I use she and they pronouns.

This is my eighteenth time attending Rosh Hashannah services at Dorshei Tzedek, so I know that these Jewish Journeys usually end with; “and that’s how I ended up here.” But- I’m only 21. I didn’t end up here, I started here.

My mom, Diana, and my dad, Richard, joined Dorshei Tzedek when I was three. Judaism was important to each of them, although in different ways. My mom grew up in a reform shul and, as she said in her “Jewish Journey” speech 14 years ago, Judaism was always very important to her family. She wanted my younger sister Maya and I to grow up with a strong, value-oriented, Jewish community. My father’s family is also strongly identified as Jewish, although more culturally than religiously. He didn’t attend Hebrew school, but his family’s Jewish values are important to them. My parents met in the Kosher kitchen at their university, and six years later they were married by the same Rabbi who had Bat Mitzvah’d my mom.

A few years after that, I was born, and that same rabbi performed my Simchat Bat.

My earliest memories of being Jewish revolve around shabbat with my family, preschool at Temple Rayyim, and the semi-traumatic discovery that not everyone in the world celebrates Hanukkah. We joined Dorshei Tzedek in 2001, so from the time I was three, my Jewish life was strongly associated with singing and dancing to Mi chamocha at all-ages erev Shabbat services and attending Hebrew school.

My relationship with Dorshei Tzedeck’s religious school has changed over the sixteen- yes, sixteen!- years I’ve been there. In elementary school, I went from loving to learn about Jewish Values and Torah stories to absolutely dreading having to struggle over the Hebrew letters and memorize prayers. I remember feeling so ashamed when my sister Maya, who is two years younger than me, could read Hebrew more fluently than I could.

While I hated learning Hebrew, I still loved learning about holidays, Jewish history, etc. I remember when I was in sixth grade, Kitah vav, Rabbi Toba challenged my class to make 100 blessings in one day. I took her up on the challenge, and dutifully I brought a clipboard to middle school so I could record what I was blessing; from the bus that brought me to school, to my super-cool three hole-punch that clipped right into my binder, to the cookies I ate during my lunch block. I remember the triumph of getting to the number 100, and of bringing my list to Hebrew school the following Tuesday, and how proud I was when Rabbi Toba gave me miriam’s timbrel.

Religious school wasn’t my only connection to Jewish life during those years. In the fourth grade, some people from Camp JRF- now Camp Havaya, the Reconstructionist summer camp- presented to the religious school to recruit campers. I remember watching the video projected onto the wall of kids splashing in the water and flying across a zip line, and I went home that night and declared to my parents that I was going to Camp JRF that summer. They weren’t sure about sending their nine-year-old to sleep-away camp, but they took the leap of faith and let me go. My dad says he knew it was the right choice the following February when I told him I was having dreams about camp every night.

Throughout my childhood, Camp was a place I went for three to seven weeks every summer to feel safe, included, and loved. Regardless of what social traumas I was enduring here in Newton, my camp friends were a facebook groupchat message or phone call away. The Jewish values and the motto of “Howie Bee” made camp a safe and welcoming place for me.

But I still dreaded the Hebrew part of Hebrew school. Finally, in sixth grade, after enduring my whining for years, my parents told me that I didn’t have to keep going to Hebrew school - unless, that is, I wanted a Bat Mitzvah.

I wanted a Bat Mitzvah.

I’m so glad I made that choice, because in seventh grade I remembered how to love Religious school and Jewish learning. I even ended up pushing my class to come back to Hebrew school up through tenth grade, when we wrote Spiritual Autobiographies, or, as our teacher Gina Fried dubbed them, “Spirautos”!

After tenth grade, my class didn’t come back to Hebrew school, so I started working at CDT Religious school as a Madricha, teaching assistant. My first trip to Israel was the summer after 10th grade with Camp. In high school I got interested in Jewish history- my high school Junior Thesis was about FDR and the Holocaust. Judaism was also incredibly important to me during my college search, which, of course, led me to Brandeis University.

Between high school and Brandeis, I took a “gap semester” with Rustic Pathways to break out of the “liberal jewy Newton bubble”, and went to Latin America on their service and immersion program. It was a great program, but I really didn’t get along with the six American students who were my peers. Suddenly, the people I spent time with didn’t share my liberal, inclusive views. They used the word “gay” as an insult and one boy even told me at one point that if I wanted to speak Spanish I should “go back to Mexico.” While we were in a spanish immersion program. In the Dominican Republic. It was also the first time I faced real antisemitism- one of the students eventually got kicked out of the trip after I reported him for making holocaust jokes. I felt excluded and miserable for part of that trip, but it did reaffirm my commitment to my values - I stuck to them even outside of my liberal jewy Newton bubble.

After my “gap semester” though, I was very ready to dive back into the liberal jewy bubble- but this time at Brandeis. I have no doubt that I belong at Brandeis, and my Jewish identities are a huge part of that. I’m the President of the Brandeis Reconstructionist Organization “BRO” the only Recon group on a college campus, I’m heavily involved in my Jewish sorority, and my Academic study is focused on Jewish sexuality - with the goal of eventually becoming a Reconstructionist Rabbi. It was a Brandeis professor who suggested last summer that I go to Svara’s Queer Talmud Camp, which is a queer yeshiva where I learned to love Talmud study.

This past summer, I jumped headfirst into Jewish Activism- I interned (and am still interning) at Keshet, a Queer Jewish organization, and I got involved with Never Again the Jewish movement against ICE, and I was even arrested this past July for “civil disobedience”. When I got my phone back after the arrest, I remember reading a facebook post from a parent of a student I teach in Hebrew school saying that they were proud that their child had models of how to live a value-based life.

I was floored by that reaction. I knew that I was doing the right thing, and I knew that civil disobedience fell in line with Dorshei Tzedeck’s values, but I hadn’t thought of being arrested as something that would make me a role model. I hadn’t even considered my role as a religious school teacher when I made the decision to participate in the protest. I am so proud to be that model for our kids.

As I mentioned earlier, this is now my sixteenth year at CDT religious school. When I look back at my experience growing up at the Hebrew school and at the experience that our children have now, I see a lot of similarities. The commitment to giving Jewish text contemporary meaning and the strong focus on social justice work come to mind especially- I’m planning to do the same “fair-trade chocolate” project with my Kitah Hey students this year that I did when my Hebrew school class was in 5th grade.

I also see differences- even in the five years I’ve been working there rather than attending as a student, teachers have gotten more and more support in curriculum building and students have more opportunities for individualized support, which I’m sure would have helped me learn Hebrew letters and prayers with much less frustration.

As a teacher, I love watching students open up and discover the magic of Judaism. Watching eyes light up when they get into a song or dance, or the excitement of having a really great thought during hevrutah, partner torah learning, makes waking up at 8am on Sundays easy. Well, maybe not easy, but doable.

Looking back, the love of Judaism I learned at Dorshei Tzedeck’s religious school, at Camp Havaya, and from my family have made me the person I am. These communities have supported and sustained me through the ups and downs.

This isn’t a typical Jewish journey speech. I’m not going to say,  “and that’s how I ended up here,” because like I said, I’m 21, I haven’t ended up anywhere. I don’t know whether I’ll be in Boston in two years, much less whether I’ll be at Dorshei. What I can say is that wherever I do end up, Dorshei Tzedeck gave me a base for my Jewish identity, and space to grow.

Dorshei helped make me, ME. So thank you. L’Shanah Tovah Umetukah!

I was #1of18 Arrested in Boston #NeverAgainParaNadie. Here's why.

We've got ancestors at our backs.

We've got generations forward.

We've got land and spirit in our bones. 

Never Again.

Para Nadie.

Photo from Boston Globe Image Description: Maya and I holding up a sign that says "Never Again means Close the Camps" in a crowd of people at the vigil.

This was the song we sang yesterday, marching through the streets of Boston to an ICE Detention Center
barely 15 miles from where I was born. 

This was the song we sang while demonstrating against ICE's inhumane treatment of immigrants and migrants
in concentration camps across the country.

This was the song we sang as we rallied, waving our support and determination to the hundreds of detainees
inside the facility, holding signs begging us for help.

This was the song we sang as we were handcuffed, arrested, and transported to jail.

I'm proud to be #1of18 Jewish protesters who were arrested in the Never Again Action march, I'm proud to
have stood tall with my community as we were roughly thrown into cells. I may be proud, but I'm far from
done. Families have been ripped apart, people are denied access to food, water, medical care, and sanitary needs,
and physically and psychologically tortured.

These policies echo the worst of Jewish history and the worst of American history. I grew up hearing the
refrain "never again". To me, that means never again for anyone anywhere. No one, no person or group,
should experience the trauma of family separation, the violence of detention, the pain and deadliness of
degradation and dehumanization, or genocide.

Elected officials have expressed more outrage about the language used to describe the treatment of
immigrants than the treatment itself. They claim to speak for Jews, but they don’t. Rather, they weaponize
our collective trauma to distract from the atrocities in the concentration camps. Additionally, many of the
same politicians who protested the use of the term “concentration camp” to describe ICE and CBP prisons
just voted to give more funding to ICE and CBP.

This is happening in our own backyard. Now is the time to stand up, and now is the time to show up for
our fellow humans.

For more information or to find an action in your area, follow this link:
https://www.neveragainaction.com 

If you're able to make a donation to legal fees and bail, please donate here:
https://www.gofundme.com/support-jews-saying-never-again 

Here is a link to Movimiento Cosecha's website: https://www.lahuelga.com/ 

If you would like a more detailed account of my arrest, continue reading.

The "red team" at the march- the folks who decided to take risk and probably get arrested, joined with the
group towards the end of the march, and led them to the steps of the facility. Police were already there, as
was press (there were even helicopters following us!)We stood on the steps, then on my count, we all sat.
We listened as organizers spoke about the issues above, and sang loudly. When we sang our song again,
the red team stood up, and began to walk into the line of police.

As soon as we stepped onto the top step, officers turned us around and started handcuffing us with zip ties
so tight they cut off someone's circulation. We sang loudly as we were loaded into a van, then sang protest
songs and Hebrew prayers all the way to the South Bay Police Station, where all 15 people who were deemed to be
"women" (because police still operate under the gender binary) were put into a holding cell together, still
handcuffed. 

I don't know how popular this story is, but I grew up hearing a story that heaven and hell were the same,
in both, people sat at a long table with delicious food in front of them. Also in both, the people couldn't
bend their elbows. The only difference between heaven and hell is that in heaven, you feed the person opposite you.
That was what it was like in the holding cell. We took turns feeding each other the food in our pockets
(before they took it away with our belongings) and I even scratched someone's face for them!

We tried to get the police to come over to change the zip ties on the hand of the person who was losing
circulation, but they took a long time to listen. They also refused to look at one activist's medical conditions
paper, which explained her needs. Eventually, they booked the person, and then the rest of us. We got into
the holding cell at 8:10pm, and it wasn't until 1:30am that everyone had been processed. During that time,
we were moved (one by one) from the holding cell to smaller cells shared by three people, each with a toilet,
sink, and bench. I was lucky to have incredible cellmates who supported me and who I was able to support.
We sang and talked and told stories. 

The entire time we were in the cell, we didn't know what time it was or how many people had been booked.
We also couldn't flush the toilet, so it stank of urine. We could see the people in the cell across from us, also
protesters, and hear people in other cells. 

When one of my cellmates asked for her call, she never received it. There was a payphone in the cell which
made only collect calls. I got to speak briefly to Maya, and also to the Jail Support team, but the calls kept
dropping out. 

Around 1:30am, the last protester was booked. We then sat in the cells for half an hour waiting for the
bondman to collect our bail commissioner fees and releases started around 2am. The last people were released around 3:30am. As
we were released, the incredible people who volunteered for jail support greeted us with food, water, and wet
wipes, and cheered as we got outside! Outside, we read the article from the Globe, which has a photo of Maya
and I! 

Our court hearing was set for 8:30am today, so after 4 hours of sleep we went to the courthouse in Roxbury. Our
lawyer talked us through the process. We were charged with trespassing, a criminal charge with a maximum
penalty of $100 or six months in jail. There was a lot of hullabaloo about reports, because not everyone's police
papers had come yet. We listened to another case read, and a woman who we didn't know and wasn't part of the
system reminded us "never forget your first amendment rights". 

Ultimately, our lawyers convinced the DA to null process/not process the charges. This means that we had no
criminal record and no fine- it was like it never happened. When that was announced, people cried- including the
prosecutor. It was clear that everyone in the room (prosecutor, judge, etc) were supporting us. The lawyer reminded
the room, on the record, that we were proud of our actions. 

I'm a white woman, so I had a "get out of jail free" card. I'm free, but thousands are not. 

Please, please, please join the fight against ICE. 

Here are the links again in case you missed it:

For more information or to find an action in your area, follow this link: https://www.neveragainaction.com 

If you're able to make a donation to legal fees and bail, please donate here: https://www.gofundme.com/support-jews-saying-never-again

Here is a link to Movimiento Cosecha's website: https://www.lahuelga.com/

My name is Lily Fisher Gomberg, and I am Reconstructing Judaism

Hi everyone!

A week ago, I had the incredible opportunity to attend Rooted and Relevant: Reconstructing Judaism in 2018, the convention for the Reconstructing Judaism movement. Before I dive into my unsolicited and probably incoherent reflections, I want to thank the folks at Dorshei Tzedek, Camp Havaya (formerly JRF), and the Brandeis Reconstructionist Organization (BRO) for causing me to fall in love with Judaism again and again, and especially reconstructionist Judaism. A special thank you to BRO again and to my mom & dad, for helping fund me coming to this convention.

This is aggressively long. Feel free to skim or skip to the last paragraph.

I arrived at the convention on Thursday afternoon, and after a brief confusion about what hotel I was staying in, I was able to attend some programs. The first program I attended was called Corporate T'shuvah, taught by soon-to-be-rabbi Ari Witkin, and it was about whether or not corporations are able to perform the work of t'shuvah (a Jewish term for repentance) or not, as well as how our obligation to forgive factors in. It was a really interesting to hear, and what struck me was more our discussions on who is obligated to ask forgiveness and the idea of obligation to forgive. We read some super interesting work from Rabbi David Blumenthal on the subject, and also discussed t'shuvah as a spiritual obligation vs a social one. It was great to walk in and be welcomed immediately, even though it wasn't the program I thought it would be. It was very interesting to look at corporations' morality, especially after spending so much time in classes talking about legal cases or finances.


The second program I went to was the Rule of Six, run by Victoria Guenther (sp?). It was an art project based on identity, below is my final work. The idea was to paint our identity with one word written across it, so I put a lot of multicolored dots because I always have a lot of things going on, but under the dots I had a layer of purple sparkles because I try to bring light and sunshine to everything I do. Across it, I wrote the Hebrew "דרשנה" from the root "דרש" meaning to demand, require, seek, need, or search for, and biblically to turn to higher guidance or powerful forces (thanks Morfix). Those are all things I do regularly, and I do feel like I'm constantly searching for myself in some way, and maybe that's the only true constant in personality is that it's inconstant. It's not a word technically, I just added a feminine ending to the word "דרשנ", meaning the person giving dvar Torah or a sermon. I also like that because I want to be a Rabbi, and it's very in my character to decide the word should be feminine so to create it! In addition, the root is the same as the first word in my home synagogue's name Dorshei Tzedeck- seekers of justice.

After the afternoon programs there was Ma’ariv, followed by dinner where I was able to reconnect with folks from my shul at home, QTC, camp alumni, and brandeis grads. I sat with a group of young people who are part of the Shapiro Fellowship, a fellowship to help bring Reconstructing Judaism to young people (I applied to the group but was told I’m too young- the cutoff age was 22).

Friends from QTC

Friends from Dorshei Tzedeck (my home synagoge)

Camp JRF (now Havaya) Alumni and Faculty

After dinner there was a panel led by Rabbi Sid Schwartz with Rabbis Lauren Grabelle Hermann, Michael Strassfeld, and Shira Stutman entitled Reconstructing Jewish Communities about how Judaism is changing, evolving, and becoming reconstructed today, and how to moderate that change and growth. The rabbis were all very intelligent, and made great points about how young Jews are increasingly disaffiliated or identifying as SBNR (Spiritual but Not Religious) so Judaism needs to find ways besides prayer to engage us. I liked the phrasing of Judaism as a “technology” through which people can make meaning of life. However, it did feel like a lot of adults telling me what I wanted, and it was interesting to me that the Shapiro Fellowship was never mentioned and there were no young Jews on the panel.

After that panel and a day of travel, I fell asleep! I did have a funny moment when I walked into the hotel, and the camp directors were all sitting in the lobby. My first thought was "Wow it's way past when I'm supposed to be in my room- I'm going to get kicked out of camp!!" Then my logical mind caught up with me and realized 1) I don't have a curfew because I'm an adult and 2) I'm not at camp, or even working for camp! Haha!

On Friday morning, I woke up for weekday Shacharit (the morning service), where I wrapped teffilin (a ritual object-just google it if you don’t know what it is) and went through the entire service wearing it, for the first time in a room with other non-men wearing teffilin. The opening remarks after shacharit were from Rabbi Isaac Saposnik from Camp Havaya, and Rabbi Deborah Waxman, the head of the Reconstructing Judaism movement. We also watched a video that I was featured in, along with a couple of my BRO board member friends! The video can be found here:

The first workshop I attended was the Torah of #MeToo with Mira Wasserman, which addressed the ethical issues of #MeToo in relation to Jewish ethics. We read Chofetz Chaim Part I Prohibition on Evil Speech principle 10, 1-6 and Moed Katan 17a, which addressed the issue of LacShon Hara (evil speech, often in reference to gossip) and assault. The conversation revolved in large part around issues of motivation for telling- are you telling for the benefit of the victim, out of hatred for the perpetrator, or out of a zealotry for the truth? The first and last reasons are acceptable, whereas the middle one is not. It was a very interesting session, not because I actually changed any opinions, but because, as Mira said, even though “there is no Masechet Me Too in the Talmud”, “the Talmud and other resources can be very helpful in figuring out the ethical issues of #MeToo”.

The next workshop I went to was about Inclusive Judaism with Rabbi Sandra Lawson, one of the rabbis I’ve been hoping to meet for a while. Her twitter is one of my favorite rabbinic accounts (in addition to rabbi Danya Ruttenberg, who I also got to learn from, stay tuned). The workshop was worth the anticipation! We sang and Koach played drums (it was so good), and then studied using this source sheet, which she made public on Sefaria because she’s awesome. We discussed the language shift from biblical sources, which refer to “other”s as “stranger”s, to talmudic sources, which discuss “other”s as “convert”s, and the possibility of this reflecting a tribal understanding to a religious understanding, and whether someone has the ability to join the Jewish people. As Koach (another amazing neshamah) pointed out though, most of the groups we as Jews have trouble including; queer Jews, Jews of color, differently abled Jews, etc, are not the stranger, but family. We also talked about what it means to “ואהבת לרעך כמוך” translated as “and love your neighbor as yourself” and ways in which self-love (or lack of self love) manifests. Someone, I can’t remember now who, said that it reminded them of the air masks in airplanes- put on your own before assisting others. We also discussed the golden vs “platinum” rule, instead of treat others as you would like to be treated, treat others as they would like to be treated- with the understanding that sometimes it’s hard to know how others would like to be treated.

My last Friday workshop was with the directors of camp Havaya Arts, and we talked about the kinds of activities they do there to bring Judaism and art together in meaningful ways for children. We did some improv, some journaling, and some drawing with pastels, again surrounding issues of identity. I really liked the program, and it was fun to get a little taste of what the camp is like.

Instead of Mincha, I went to take a nap before Kabbalat Shabbat services. The Kabbalat Shabbat service was awesome, and I sat with the Shapiro Fellows. Well, I sat in between the times when I was dancing! The d’var (sermon) was about Joseph’s dream with the ladder and the line “אָכֵן יֵשׁ ה’ בַּמָּקוֹם הַזֶּה; וְאָנֹכִי, לֹא יָדָעְתִּי” “Surely G!d is in this place; and I, I knew it not”. After Shabbat dinner and a spirited concert that I actually skipped, I sat with some of the Shapiro fellows for a bit before heading to bed.

Saturday morning, I went to the big services with a huge torah service and sat with some friends from camp who were there! It was fun to reminisce about camp and talk about what worked and didn’t work, et cetera. At the service, I got to hear Rabbi Deborah Waxman's d'var. Shabbat lunch was also nice, and the Shabbat workshops were awesome. The first one I went to was Lessons in Humility with Rabbi Sarra Lev and it went a bit over my head. It was about Humility from a Petichta (explanation) and the Talmud (rabbinic works on Judaism). We studied Lev Rabbah on Parshat Vayikra 1:5 in relation to Leviticus I, and the extra words and letters in parts of Torah especially when G!d speaks to Moses. I wasn’t quite able to follow the conversation, because I’ve hardly studied Talmud and I was in a room full of rabbis and rabbinical students, but I really loved getting to absorb what I could. I also got to sit in between my two rabbis from my home congregation, which was grounding for me and also fun!

The last workshop I went to on Saturday was Anger, Joy, and Grief: Jewish Spiritual Resistance, with another Rabbi I’ve been waiting for an opportunity to meet and learn from, Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg, who works for Avodah and again I follow on Twitter. The workshop was about the internal tools for resistance, and Rabbi Danya urged us to embrace positive discomfort. First, we did a meditation on anger, which made me feel actually grateful for my anger- because it means I have love and compassion. We looked at Mishnah Sanhedrin 10:6 and discussed anger as destructive vs. constructive anger, and where that anger comes from. Anger can be outrage, or it can be pain/fear. A lot of texts talk about anger with a metaphor of fire- which makes sense because sometimes anger can burn everything in its path to a crisp, but it can also be productive when wielded well. When we did a meditation on grief, it felt harder to get into and also harder to get out of. Grief opens us to understanding the human experience, and it's expressed in our texts as lament- crying out in pain when presented with the pain of others, who Rabbi Danya pointed out are also in the divine image. We cry out in "recognition that the world has been suddenly irreversibly changed," and, to use the fire metaphor again, "in the ashes, to see what is possible now". The last meditation was on joy, which allows us to connect and build beauty. The discussion moved to joy as resilience; protection from the rest of it. With the idea of resilience comes resistance, which helps grief (as an instigator for empathy) integrate with anger (as an incubator for justice) come together to form action. In talking about these three emotions - anger, joy, and grief - we thought about how emotions connect us, yet we all experience them differently. Rabbi Danya said that everybody relates differently, and has a different place in the revolution, so "we need all hands on deck, and there's a lot of deck!" I really loved that workshop, it helped me name a lot of connections that I notice in my emotions, and it felt really healthy to process in that way.

Dinner on Saturday night wasn't provided, so I went with camp friends! Aidan, Lea, Hillary, Beth (Aidan's mom- she's really a lovely woman) and I went to a vegetarian/vegan Chinese restaurant, where the food was great and the service was not. To be fair- they were a veggie within walking distance of  Reconvention, so they were pretty packed.  After dinner, we walked back to the hotel for a beautiful Havdalah service and an awesome concert from Nefesh Mountian- a Jewish bluegrass band that I adore! I spent some of the time hanging out and dancing with a seven-year-old I met there, and we even went up on stage for a few songs! My favorite Nefesh Mountian song is called "On and On" and camp alumni were called up for it, which was a pretty magical experience. They also sang a new song, in response to the Pittsburgh shooting, which was incredibly moving especially because they called a congregant from Dor Hadash, the Recon synagogue that meets in Tree of Life, up on stage for it. After the concert, I hung out with the Shapiro fellows then went to bed!

Sunday morning my workshop was called Challenges and Opportunities for Progressive Jews on College Campuses. It was really meant for Hillel professionals, but it was fun to be the token college student! The panelists were Rabbis Isabel DeKonick, Jessica Lott, and Joshua Bolten, and they framed campus institutions as attempting to answer the "big questions of Jewish adulthood" and find ways to bring in communal experience in an ever-more individualistic age. Rabbi Jessica talked about engaging Jewish people at the emerging state of adulthood and gave us a lot of statistics for campuses which were really interesting. One was that 95% of American Jews go to college, but "only" 80% have Pesach seders. She also argued that liberal or progressive Jews generally feel uncomfortable in services, so they tend to join other Jewish groups such as a capella (@Ba'note, Maginah, NJBeats...) social justice groups (@JstreetU, etc) and greek life (@Sigma @AEPi etc). That makes a lot of sense to me. Rabbi Josh made a distinction between what he called "empowerment Jews" who show up, who want to be Jewish leaders, and "engagement Jews" who won't naturally show up for Judaism. He said that "most Jews on campus are not motivated by their Judaism. It's barely an extracurricular for them." Later when I talked with Rabbi Jessica, she said that Brandeis is a special case, because the "engagement Jews" at Brandeis are "empowerment Jews" everywhere else- which makes sense and is interesting. Overall an interesting workshop, even though it wasn't geared towards me. I feel like I have a better understanding of what Jews on other campuses are facing, as well as a peek into Hillel International and thereby into Hillel at Brandeis.

After that workshop, there was a final workshop session, but I hung out with Aidan and Beth instead before lunch. At lunch, there was a program called "Reconstructing Sharktank" where people competed with different ideas for moving Reconstructing Judaism forward, and the prize was money to help it happen. The winning idea was to hire an additional rabbi to a synagogue who would offer fee-for-service counseling etc. It was cool. Then Deborah Waxman made some closing remarks, and it was all done!

There's one memory I really want to share from Reconvention. There were a few tables of vendors set up not on Shabbat, like RitualWell, the Reconstructionist Press, Roasting Rabbi, etc. One was an Israeli man, maybe in his sixties, selling handmade jewelry with Hebrew and Jewish symbols on it. It was so beautiful, I stood around for a while asking him what the Hebrew meant and talking with him. He told me he went to Hebrew U, and I told him I wanted to be a rabbi. After a little bit, I told him "I'm afraid to ask how much your Jewelry is" and he asked why, so I explained that I was a student. He asked me which one I liked, and I told him that I really love one made of silver with the words of the Shema on it. He said "that one is seventy dollars" and I started to tell him I couldn't afford it, but he said "it's a gift." I told him I couldn't accept that as a gift, he made it with his own hands and he said "and I'm giving it to you with my own hands. It is for you, so that you know that you can afford anything and in thanks that you are young and want to keep the spirit of Judaism alive." He wouldn't take no for an answer, so I left with it! It's really gorgeous.

I wanted to make sure I told that story, because I think it really exemplifies the sense of community, passion, and looking forward to the future that all of Reconvention had.

Thank you for reading my unsolicited and probably incoherent thoughts and reflections, or at leastfor scrolling to the end!

Light & Love,

LilyFish